GLITTERVOMIT

girl meets internet. they fall in love.

I also have that desire to blurt stuff out, but I’ve learned I can’t do that. Not when you realise the whole world is listening. That’s why perhaps I look so uncomfortable in interviews at times.

(Source: kristensource, via avacyn-guardian-angel)

sassybabushka:

My friend knows someone who keeps all her money in a  hollow dildo. If you don’t think that’s genius, just imagine a robber stealing from a teenage girl’s room. Is he going to look in the dildo? Is he even going to want to touch the dildo?? No. A hollow dildo is safer than any safe or lock. 

Be safe, kids. Keep your money in a dildo.

(via ya-bissshhh)

mishasminions:

applespine:

edwardspoonhands:

leander-ligo:

lordthundercox:

Yes, it does.

Guys get morning wood because our bladders fill up during the night and begin to press against our prostate, causing arousal. Our dicks don’t just feel the sun coming up and think “My time has come”

Shhhhh…
…boner wave…

is this what tumblr thinks up at night

MY TIME HAS COME

mishasminions:

applespine:

edwardspoonhands:

leander-ligo:

lordthundercox:

Yes, it does.

Guys get morning wood because our bladders fill up during the night and begin to press against our prostate, causing arousal. Our dicks don’t just feel the sun coming up and think “My time has come”

Shhhhh…

…boner wave…

is this what tumblr thinks up at night

MY TIME HAS COME

(Source: iraffiruse)